Sauerkraut Saft

10:23PM - Non-Paris -- Non-Dakar

Relocation from San Francisco to Atlanta is in progress: Yosemite, Death Valley, Grand Canyon, Petrified Forest -- check. The total of 3000 miles by car is planned, 1500 to go.

10:19PM - Summing up

The last bunch of posts appeared unillustrated because of an underdeveloped cell-phone client. Here is a recap of the South Asian voyage: the aquatic part (Krabi - Phi Phi - Mergui archipelago)



and the Myanmar adventures (Yangon - Bagan - Inle Lake)



Click the images to get higher resolution.

4:37AM - U.S.A.!... U.S.A.?!

It's getting rediculous at SFO... We are watching the conveyer belt for TWO hours already. Are they searching the bags? Did they find my bottle of gin made from rice and old car tires approved by "Myanmar foodstuff company"? Or the bottle of shochu developed "in close collaboration with Japanese organizations"?

4:27AM - Where is my Kalashnikov when it is needed?

On the last day in Yangon we had another strike of luck. Several entrances to the main pagoda were blocked. It turned out that Mr.Dictator itself was visiting. Despite a little army accompanying the dude brandishing automatic weapons, a couple of limonkas would've accomplished the mission -- we were as close as 15 meters away.
One grenade to take out the dude, another for the Buddha image with the dude's face that the dude was paying tribute to.

12:57PM - Small plane of existence

In search of enlightenment the tickets to Bagan were booked. This was done one day in advance that beats my previous record for securing transportation by air (3 days in Thailand).

Having been introduced to the history and structure of religion in Burma, let me assure you that there is no more crazy concoction: Theravada Buddhism with magical pagan cults of 37 Nats, alchemy, and astrology.

The magical things started happening early: in the domestic airport of Yangon airport I ran into friends doing the same route. We have not seen each other for more than 3 years -- all recent conscious attempts to meet in the country we live in have failed.

So there we were, spending 2 days in Bagan biking along Irrawaddy river, harassing Popa monkeys, and consuming doubly distilled palm sap moonshine.

9:51AM - Captain No-Worry gives no garantie

Tired of crowds of divers -- take a liveaboard to Mergui. Your boat is guaranteed to be the only one on the dive site at EVERY dive site. The underwater life that you can find in diversity beats anything I've seen so far.
The whale sharks did not come... but a more rare shark ray, a.k.a. guitar shark, showed up twice as well as more common black-tip, white-tip, nurse, and leopard sharks.

The trip from Burma to Burma via Bangkok went fine: we are in Yangon, the most beautiful city in the greatest country in the world. Our contractual obligations prohibit a more precise description of the place. For details call +95 9 4347 8294.

6:50PM - Two roosters: Phi and Phi

On top of an amplifier on the local mosque in Phi Phi island, the local dive shops seem to pay two roosters living not far from our bungalow. So the schedule was: mullah (through loud speaker, 5pm), rooster #1 (5:30am), and rooster #2 (6am). Dive shops are suspect, since they are interested in customers bringing their asses to the shops at 7am.

To Burma we go.

12:11PM - Allah a la thai

Have you been to Crimea? Remember how Russian pop-sa blasting in the speakers of your favorite cafe used to stop 5 times a day?
Well, cafes, tuk-tuks, Thai massage, etc. do not intend to pause for a second here, despite a rather large mosque situated... next to our hotel: being jet-lagged and awake at 5pm I enjoy the morning mullah's vocalize.
The hotel itself is served by a swarm of smiling Thai ladies headscarfed and all. Daily meals feature as much pork as you like and, in general, everything that may please an infidel is still available here in Ao Nang.

Current music: "Abdullah Ibrahim" by Queen

6:27PM - Route 66

The direct flight LAX-BKK took 18 hours and two calendar days. Besides real silverware Thai Air suprised by featuring almost complete filmography of... Johnny Depp.
4 movies and 18 hours later I feel a new man... with a new phone number: +66-8-9723-1381.

4:05PM - Blame it on Hindus

We should all learn what to do, when your dish does not turn out well, from the restaurant of the Badlands Lodge. The deepfried piece of dough, for instance, can be named "Indian bread". If that does not work, try putting blame on several nations at once, as in the next item on the menu: "Indian taco".

2:35PM - Rambling wreck

Chicago - the Cities - Atlanta - the Cities - Badlands - Yellowstone - Grand Teton - Berkeley. For now.

I would have left for Wyoming, but it would not have been mamonning.

7:18PM - Le tour est fini

Our european voayge is over. Thanks to the supporters of the team.

 ... to be continued...

1:33AM - In the world of animals

Kharkov remains to be a city of animals. New species evolved over the years: from porcupines eating cucumbers to bears feeding on used tires. 


Some of the beasts start performance careers as is in case of Misha and Gesha, who do jumps as they are rewarded with fish, or that cat from the advertisement of the concert of a man dressed in white forcing a cat to hit the keyboard.


All in all the fauna of Kharkov beats that of Amsterdam, the latter being limited to horses.

 

7:42PM - Kiev-mama, Kharkov-papa

1:43PM - Our 5 cents

One should spell carefully when traveling, 'cause one may end up in Krakov despite the intention to visit the center of the universe (Kharkov). There is one thing to see in Krakov and it is actually outside of the city: salt mines of Wieliczka. Sculptures of various historical figures taste salty if licked -- it looks like one of our compatriots has licked the papal boot.

2:17AM - Evro-pa

The route is Barcelona-Krakow-Kiev-Kharkov-Amsterdam-Paris. I see many compatriots (or traces of) on every touristic corner in Europe. It could be because my radars catch even smallest bits of the language  ("Sho?") or, perhaps, 'cause of the bare fact that "Sashoosya was here" is in the air.
Now that cult-shock is behind us, we can appreciate 4 gloomy looking bayanists buttoning away their classic repertoir.

1:20AM - Under

Although Jamaican waters do not offer too many challenges -- most sites are relatively shallow (60- feet) -- the usual tropical splendor may be observed in selected places.

The reef is being destroyed by global warming the locals who dump all kinds of shit in the water and seem to have no regulations for fishing whatsoever. Beer bottles and fish traps could be found on any dive. The so-called "blind" traps -- the ones with no buoy attached so that the "fish pirates" can not discover them -- are the most depressing site: often they get abandoned and simply accumulate dead fish. 

 
The water temperature makes Jamaica a perfect place for easy relaxing dives (modulo trash). As they say,  "such @#$%@# winter"!

6:05PM - Scientology for poor?

One fact about Jamaica is that there are the most religions per capita here. According to some sources, one of them has been started in the first half of 20th century by people, who put a certain spin on a biblical prophecy saying that "a king will rise in the East". Apparently the "elect of God" was not particularly interested in taking part in this play, yet the movement got his name.
The access to the spiritual core is granted through a substance abundant on the island. The government is against the substance: according to locals, the rulers want to establish a stronger cocaine market...

Note: make sure the divemaster is not completely stoned.

1:58PM - What good for russian, death to german

I am in Jah-Jah-land studying local folklore. My favorite proverb so far: "I no come to hear about how horse dead an' cow fat".   

3:19PM - Loathing... in Cancun

Despite all recommendations I've decided to rent an automobile in Mexico for a couple days. The idea was to use a local company, which rents out vehicles in Playa del Carmen with a drop off at Cancun airport.
So there was a representative waiting for us as we disembarked the ferry coming from Cozumel; he took us for a 10 minute walk to a car and then drove it to the agency where the paperwork had to be filled out. All this done in complete silence -- no words on his part whatsoever. The manager of this joint gave us a big smile, "welcome amigos", etc. There was also a kind of chuckle that I came to hate in mexican vendors: it may well be untrue, but...